A client of mine – brilliant, the kind who lights up a room with ideas – got the call last week. Three months, six gruelling interviews, and a recruiter hyping him up with “They’re obsessed with you!” every other day. He was all in, heart on the table.
Then the email: “We’ve gone another direction.”
His text to me: “Feels like I got ghosted by a future I was already living in.”
Can we just sit with that for a second? That hollow, what-the-hell-just-happened ache. It’s more than just a job. It’s the life you’d started sketching in your head, the new office, the team you’d lead, the problems you’d solve.
This happens to the best of us, and I believe it’s worth unpacking, because this moment, in the rubble of a “no”, is where a lot of us wobble. We lose our spark, our nerve, and our thread.
But, this is a messy, human, maybe-even-beautiful pivot.
Here’s what you need to know:
- This is normal. Getting to the final round and not landing it happens. Harvard Business Review says nearly half of final-round execs feel rattled by a rejection. So, remeber you’re not alone in this.
- It’s not a verdict on you. Your skills, your track record, your expertise are still intact. That job wasn’t the only stage for your talents.
- You’ve already done something big. You made it to the end game and you clarified what lights you up. You stretched in ways you don’t see yet.
This stuff hurts. It’s not just the rejection, but it’s the time, the energy, the hope you poured in. And the data backs it up:
- 48% of final-round candidates say rejection shakes their confidence (HBR).
- But those who keep moving often land in roles that fit better; more aligned and more impactful.
So, if you’re sitting in this moment, feeling like you’ve been kicked in the gut, here’s where we start.
What now? Let’s move through it together
- Ride the momentum. You were in the game so stay in it. Send that thank-you note to the hiring panel. Something real and warm, that keeps the door cracked open. Reach out to the contacts you made along the way. Let them know you’re still out there, still curious, still ready. People remember the ones who don’t disappear.
- Reflect, don’t spiral. Grab a coffee (or a whiskey) and ask yourself: What clicked in that process? What felt off? Did the role really match your soul, or were you chasing the shiny title? There’s gold in those questions. I keep a notebook for these moments; scribbles of what I learned, what I want next. This can bring clarity.
- Stay loud. Don’t go quiet. Post on LinkedIn about what you’re learning, what you’re building. Share a snippet of your strategy deck (sanitized, obvs). Connect with someone new in your field. Visibility is energy and it keeps you in the orbit of the next big thing.
- Keep your story alive. You’re still a leader and you’re still shaping your future. Tell that story to yourself first, then to the world. It’s what pulls you forward.
A quick story I was talking with a mentor the other night, someone who’s been in the C-suite for decades. She told me about a role she didn’t get years ago. She was in the final round, thought it was hers. But that “no” pushed her to rethink what she wanted. Six months later, she landed a gig that redefined her career; bigger scope, better fit and more ‘her’.
“That rejection was the best thing that never happened to me” she said.
There is relief in letting go. When I floated this idea to a LinkedIn group crew last week, I asked, “Anyone else feeling this – the relief of not pretending everything’s fine?”
Sarah said: “It’s like I can finally exhale. Knowing I’m not the only one who didn’t land the dream job feels… freeing.”
Mike said: “I was so caught up in ‘I have to get this,’ but now I see it wasn’t the only path.”
That’s the thing. We’ve been gripping so tight to the idea that this job, this moment, is the one that defines us. But when we let go of that, there’s relief. Space to breathe and apace to see what else is out there.
One last thought – rejection sucks, but it’s only a detour. And sometimes, the detour takes you somewhere you were always meant to go.
Share this with anyone who’s ever been knocked back and needs a hand-up. There’s a bunch of us out there.
Drop your thoughts and your questions in the comments.
In your corner, always.
Kate xx
PS – if you feel you’d like us to continue the conversation on this topic, let me know. My business partner Paul Sansom GAICD and I would be happy to host a webinar on this to help anyone who’s at this crossroads.
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